Unknown Lands

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The Unknown Lands of Pandora is regarded as a "Multiverse" forum or a "Free Forum" meaning that we are not based on a single series, but rather multiple with our own custom systems. Each "Kingdom" of Pandora is another anime/cartoon series with other various sub series that make up the entire land.

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Unknown Lands

Welcome to the world of Unknown Lands Roleplay Forum!

If you have questions you can create an account and post on our questions section or join our Discord! (https://discord.gg/jupj2Zh) If you have any questions on lore and our systems, please don't hesitate to ask us.

The Unknown Lands of Pandora is regarded as a "Multiverse" forum or a "Free Forum" meaning that we are not based on a single series, but rather multiple with our own custom systems. Each "Kingdom" of Pandora is another anime/cartoon series with other various sub series that make up the entire land.

We can't wait to meet you!

Unknown Lands

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Welcome Guest! Your last visit was . You have made 118 posts! Please welcome our newest member, Amaihana!


    Sonya Grade 1/3

    Shini Chikai
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    Post by Shini Chikai Mon May 22, 2017 6:48 pm

    Name: Combat Knife
    Owner: @Kasey
    Type: Weapon
    Rank: Weak
    Description: A small blade that is used for battle like in war or for more ultility purposes like camping. It's small and compact made for easy travel, or easy hiding.
    Spoiler:
    Length: Eight inches
    Weight: 1 lbs
    Strengths:
    - Deals D-Ranked damage.
    - Can be used to cut people or ties/ropes
    Weaknesses:
    - Durability of 2 D-Spell hits/5 weak hits
    - Can be stolen
    - Can't protect from spells
    Ability: N/a


    Last edited by Shini Chikai on Sat May 27, 2017 8:37 pm; edited 2 times in total
    Fetus
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    Post by Fetus Sun Oct 29, 2017 2:14 pm

    Shane
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    Post by Shane Sun Oct 29, 2017 5:48 pm

    First of all, can be used for a variety of purposes is too vague as a strength. What purposes specifically is it used for?

    Secondly, id like to see a bit more description than a picture and one sentence in the description section (I know I'm more picky than some)

    Third, that weight seems to be a bit light for a knife of that size, I looked it up and an average weight for a knife of that size is closer to 1 lb.

    4th: I'd like to see one more strength and weakness please.

    @Fetus
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    Post by Fetus Sun Oct 29, 2017 6:00 pm

    "But its 2 weakness and 3 strengths?"
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    Post by Shane Sun Oct 29, 2017 6:10 pm

    Whoops forgot that, ignore that, but regardless, the other edits need to be made. It should not be 1 "pund" for weight, but rather listed as 1 lb. Secondly, "a small blade" in the description is redundant, you already mentioned that in the other sentence. Third, if you are going to keep that " a small blade" sentence fix you capitalization and punctuation and move it to where the other description sentence is to avoid confusion and make it easier to read. Ability should be N/A, not none.

    @Fetus
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    Post by Fetus Sun Oct 29, 2017 6:34 pm

    bump
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    The Elemental

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    Character Sheet
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    Post by Shane Sun Oct 29, 2017 6:38 pm

    N/A should have a / between the letters, not just listed as na. Move one of the description sentences to one side of the spoiler, top or bottom, pick one but they need to be together to make it easier to read. Remove the s from the end of lbs. Bump when completed the edits.
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    Post by Fetus Sun Oct 29, 2017 8:03 pm

    Bump
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    The Elemental

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    Post by Shane Sun Oct 29, 2017 8:25 pm

    The slash in n/a is the wrong way and there needs to be a gap between the description text and the part of the template saying Description:
    Fetus
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    Post by Fetus Mon Oct 30, 2017 2:40 pm

    bump
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    Post by Shane Mon Oct 30, 2017 3:15 pm

    Approved.
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    Post by Fetus Mon Oct 30, 2017 4:50 pm

    The app itself is perfect, good job. . . (only flaw is measurement, it would be PERFECT if handle/blade. not just overall.)

    The only issue is your grading. You want to nitpick every little typo. You need to be prepared to do a lot of the little things yourself. A lot of people are stupid, and dragging out grading doesn't help either side.

    Also to quote the app and highlight the errors makes it easier.

    OKAY

    (3 More apps until promotion)

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